On a sunny afternoon on the way home from day camp when Milo was about 5, he cheerfully told me about the funny word written under the slide at the park. “F-U-C-K? Few-ch? Is that right? What does it mean?”
Sigh. My very favorite word. A word he’d heard regularly since birth. A word I knew I should stop saying, but didn’t. And now I had to explain, in an age appropriate way, the ins-and-outs of the f-bomb.
Script for 3 to 8 year olds:
Fuck is an ugly word and it’s definitely not a word for kids to use. It is one of the worst swear words out there. People feel very uncomfortable when they hear this word. So the rule in our family, is that kids don’t say that word.
If they know what sex is, then tell them it means “sex.” If they don’t, it’s time to start the sex talking party. You can explain what fuck means after they know about sex. Consider this a great opportunity!
Script for 9+:
Fuck is an ugly way of saying “sex.” It’s definitely not a word for kids to use and it is one of the worst swear words out there. People feel very uncomfortable when they hear this word. So the rule in our family, is that kids don’t say that word.
People use this word in all kinds of ways – an adjective, verb, noun, etc. But at the end of the day, it’s really about sex. It’s crass and harsh and I’m going to ask you not to use it.
Script for potty mouthed parents (like me):
As you know, you’ve heard me say this word with regularity. I probably shouldn’t, but I do. You can get in trouble for using this word, so it’s smarter if you don’t use it. However, I don’t want to be a hypocrite, so you can swear in front of me and with your best friend, but not in front of other adults or kids.
It’s your choice, but be aware that it’s very offensive and could get you in big trouble.
I know you are now punching the air with your fist and saying, “Fuck ya! Thanks for the scripts, Amy!”