Milo is going to be quaking in a corner with embarrassment someday, and it’ll all be because of me. It’s not enough that I talk about sex for a living; I have to tell tales about him too.
My parents are here, visiting for the holidays and my mom reminded me of one of Milo’s many funny quips, which sent me down memory lane, remembering our days in Bremerton, WA. Milo was 2 and had plenty to say about his body.
Her favorite was the day Milo and I were sitting on the couch, looking at a book and he looked at me and said, out of nowhere, “I love my penis!”
I love the day we were on our way back to Bremerton from Seattle and we were on the ferry. Fortunately we were in the car.
Milo announced that he was hungry, so I unwrapped a piece of string cheese for him and passed to back to him. He grabbed it and then proceeded to wave it around and yell at the top of his lungs “Cheese penis, mama! Cheese penis!” He did this over and over and over.
I was crying I was laughing so hard and trying desperately to hide it because I didn’t want this to become a regular thing. You’ll be happy to know, it didn’t.
Finally, my mother in law was over visiting and Milo had just awakened from a nap. He was wearing nothing but a tee shirt and sitting on a big arm chair, all by himself.
Suddenly, he leaned back, spread his legs, whapped himself in the crotch and said “Baaaaaalls…baaaaaaaaaaalls…”
My wonderful mother in law looked at me; looked at Milo and said “Time for some underpants!”